In love for real?
by iloveTRIPLEbrownies
Summary: Spencer and Ashley are both actresses. Ashley is in love with Spencer, but what happens if Spencer is engaged? ...South twist in real life.
1. Engaged!

**(A/N : okay this is my very first time writing a fanfic so hope you guys like it)**

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BEEP...BEEP...BEEP...

8.00 a.m. Ugh...to early! I don't really like to wake up early but for my work I will!

Uh um...let me introduce myself. I'm Ashley Davies. I'm an actress. I play Mandy Musgrave on the teen show South Of Nowhere. Besides acting I also love music. I'm actually working on my album with my best friend Taylor. I know her like forever. She is also my roommate and my producer.

I have a boyfriend. yeah bummer to you guys! His name is Aiden. I know him since we were kids. His one of the people i can trust with my heart and know he will be there for me. We've been dating on and off. We first dated when we were in high school. Than about 6 months later we're off. That happend like 3 or 4 times now. But everytime i was the blame on it.

Oh yeah...my parents...they are divorced and my father is this famous rockstar...Raife Davies. He's always on tour with his band and is never around.

my mother Cristine has always been there for me. She kinda look like a bitch but she's cool though if you get to know her better.

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I took a quick shower and went to the kitchen for some breakfast_._

''Good morning''

''Good morning Tay''

''So are you excited for the new season?''

''Oh hella yeah! Season 3 is going to be awesome!''

''Oh wait! Is there going to be more make out scenes?!'' can't believe she just ask that!

''Oh my god Tay! Is that the only thing you always think about?!''

''No, not always...okay thats a lie but most of the time...yeah.'' okay that is soo true!

''Well I've to go pick up Spencer and drive with her to the set.''

''So how are things between you guys?''

''Uhm...i don't know...normal?!''

''No I mean...is everything cool between you two?''

''I don't know Tay, I still have feelings for her but I think it's to late. Look she have a boyfriend and I have Aiden so yeah. Everything cool.'' I hope.

''Okay. I see you tonight then.''

''Bye, love you!''

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So you probably wonder what happened between me and Spencer huh?! Okay it all started when we were filming season 2 for SoN. There where a lot of Mabrielle (Mandy and Gabrielle) scenes in it so I start having this feelings for her. By the end of season 2 I wanted to talk to her. I asked if she could come to my apartment. There we talked. I told her that I liked her and when I did, she kissed me. Us kissing on screen is normal but this one...i was confused. From a normal kiss turns into a huge make out scene. Then she pulled back and looked me in the eyes. Her blue eyes are the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my whole life. She said that she can't be with me because of her boyfriend. I mean, come on...the dude is never around! So with that she left. Since then we never talked about it. We're still hanging around but only as friends.

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I waited for her in my car cause I didn't want to see her boyfriend Jesse.

Oh there she is. Look at her...she's so beautiful... Stop it Davies! She's your friend and colleague! Theres no way you can have her!

''Ash!'' I love it when she calls me Ash! Oh wait she's talking to me.

''Huh?!''

''You we're out of space!''

''Oh...sorry.''

''No it's okay...it's cute.'' W-w-what?! No she didn't!

''What?! Me? Ashley Davies? cute?! No no! Hot okay...cute?...that's something for Spencer Carlin not Ashley Davies.'' playing and flirting that's all we do but nothing more than that, nothing more...

''So you're saying I'm not hot but cute?!''

''Uhm...well...yea that is what I'm saying!''

''Not funny!''

''Okay okay. So you're ready?''

''Yeah...let's go.''

So we drove to the set of South, ready for another day of working.

''Ash''

''Yeah?!''

''I've something important to tell you.''

''okay, shoot.''

''Jesse asked me to marry with him.''

''WHAT?!''

EEEEEKKKKK...i had to stop the car and breathe...

''Ashley!''

''Sorry! but aren't you to young to get married?''

''What?! nooo! i love him! and that is why i said yes.''

i can't believe her. Is she serious?! are they really going to marry? and what about me?!

''Ash!''

''Yeah?''

''the car!''

''oh yeah! sorry!''

''no it's okay.''

we drove again...silent...

''so are you excited for today?''

''Yeah, you?''

''yeah me too!''

''you know my friend Taylor?''

''yeah''

''she asked me this morning if there are more make out scenes this season.''

''hahaha! really?! my friend Jordan asked the same thing too! i think they would be a perfect couple together!

''haha...yeah i think so.''

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So we finally arrive at the set. I still can't believe Spencer's engaged now. When she told me about it in the car, I felt like someone just hit me in my stomach! Yeah it hurts! But why? Am I jealous?!...no I can't! I've Aiden now. He's the sweetest guy I've ever met. So I can't be jealous about the fact Spencer's engaged...Maybe it's because I still have feelings for Spencer...Maybe it just hurts to know that the girl you like is going to get marry with some guy who's never around, busy with his own things... Maybe it hurts because she told me she likes me in the same way as I like her... Or maybe it hurts because I don't want to loose her.

Uhg! Stop it Davies! It's not like she's your girlfriend!...well maybe not now...

**(A/N: sooo what did you think about the first chapter?? I know it's kinda lame but hey! It's my first time!...okay that sound kinda gross xD lol! **

**So please! Review review review! And if you have some tips for me review please! Xoxo ) **


	2. I kissed a girl and i liked it

**(A/N: thank you sooo much for the reviews! It made my day! **

**So heres the new chapter... **

**it starts at a scene from season 3A. in one of the first episodes i think!? )**

''Here I am...i choose you.''

with that I felt her lips on mine. I never kissed her with so much love. She was the first to make a movement. The kiss continued like forever but a girl need some air right!? So I pulled back and lead her to my bed. She sat down as we continued the kiss...

''Hmm...i missed this.'' I said while looking into her eyes

''Yeah...me too'' I gave her a small kiss on her lips

''Hmm... feels like every thing is good again, isn't it?'' I wanted to kiss her again but she turned her face and gave me her cheeks.

''It's not?!''

''No!... Mandy, you left me after the shooting! My brother died and when I needed you...you were gone...you broke my heart Mandy!''

''Look I'm sorry! I never meant to break your heart!'' She stood up, walking towards the door.

''Wait Gab! I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me. I just needed some time to clear my mind.''

''Well I guess we both need to clear up our minds.''

''What do you mean?''

''Maybe we should take a break from each other.''

''NO!... I want you and only you!'' And I mean it. This is not just another scene we have to do. No, this is real. Everything I said is true and so was every kiss we did.

''No Mandy, you don't...I've to go now.'' Tears falling down my face as I stood there hurt. I wasn't acting anymore. Every tear was real.

''And CUT! Great job girls!''

Everybody gave us an applause for that scene and there was I, standing with tears falling down my cheeks. I quickly wipe it away and gave a fake smile to everyone.

Thank god it was our last shoot for today.

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''Ash, are you okay?'' Spencer asked me while we were sitting in my car. We're going to starbucks now the shoot is over for today.

''Yeah I'm fine.'' not! i'm still hurt from the scene we did ''I was just wondering if we can go to dinner some time.''

''Seems like a good idea.'' yes! Finally some time for us two. ''and maybe I can bring Jesse with me.'' WHAT?! No! Say no Ashley, say no!

''Of course you can.'' Damn Ashley! ''I bring Aiden with me so it's a double date.''

''Yeah, sounds good. So where and when?''

''uhm...how about that little Italian place near the beach? Oh I forgot the name! It's...''

''Pica Venta!''

''Yes! Thats it! And what about Friday, 7 a clock?''

''Perfect! I'll tell Jesse about it.''

''Okay it's a double date!'' I wish it wasn't.

''Yes it is. So I'll see you tomorrow?''

''Yep see you tomorrow.''

''Okay then, bye.'' she hugged and kissed me on my cheek before getting out my car.

''Bye Spence'' I wait in my car until she was inside her house. Then drove to Aidens appartment.

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I knocked on his door and wait for him to open it.

''Hey babe!'' I said and gave him a small kiss on his lips.

''Hey! Come in.'' I went inside his apartment. Everything is so messy around here.

''Oh my god babe, you really need to start cleaning up your apartment.''

''I know I know! But say that to my roommate! He's the one who's really messy. Have you seen his room?! It smells like one sweaty football team!'' eeww!

''No thanks. I so don't want to see his room!... I wanna see yours!''

''Oh really?!... Let's go then!'' haha that boy is wanting some.

''oh wait, I forgot to tell you something. We're going to dinner with Spencer and her fiancé Jesse this Friday.''

''Oh, okay cool. But babe...my room?!'' boys are so predictable

We went inside his room and what happened...something private and only to myself. Sorry guys!

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I was so tired. Aiden asked if I would like to stay with him but I said no. so now i'm driving back home to get some sleep cause tomorrow is going to be busy with shooting.

Thank god I was home! I walked inside my door and there I saw Taylor with some girl making out on MY favorite couch.

''Wow Taylor...'' she quickly turn her face to me.

''Ash! Uhm...this is Jordan. I met her yesterday at the studio.'' they stood up, fixing their clothes.

''Hey nice to meet you Ashley.'' I shake her hand while looking confuse to Taylor

''Hey nice to meet you Jordan.'' Damn! Taylor got taste.

''Well I've to go. Call me'' she said to Taylor

''it's nice to meet you Ashley.''

''Yeah you too.'' and so she left

''What was that Taylor!? I didn't knew you were gay.''

''Well I don't know either. It's strange tho, I barely know her but still I got this feeling inside me.''

''I think you have a crush on her!''

''No I'm not! I just kissed a girl. That doesn't mean I've a crush on her!''

''yes you do.'' I said with a smirk on my face

''Okay! Well maybe a little bit.''

''Aww, my Taylor has a crush. How cute is that!''

''Shut up! I'm going to bed so goodnight Ash!''

''haha goodnight Tay.''

I went to my room and changed my clothes.

_''I kissed a girl and I liked it. The taste of her cherry chap stick.'' _oh my god

''TAYLOR SHUT UP!'' I yelled from my room.

''SORRY.'' I heard her yelling from her room.

I guess she listen to me cause now I hear nothing.

I slowly closed my eyes and finally sleep. Dreaming of the one and only...Spencer.

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**(A/N: please people review! Reviews makes me smile :) and i'm sorry if this chapter sucks. i'm not so good at writing story xD lol but i'm learning! **

** so i'm going away to do some family stuff for 2 days... so i can't upload a new chapter :( sorry ! maybe if i got some time i'll promise you to post as soon as i can.**

**love ya! XOXO)**


	3. super duper double date

**(A/N: thank you for the reviews! And I hope you'll enjoy this chapter.)**

''What the hell am I going to wear?!'' ow yeah! Tonight is the double date with Spencer. I really hoped that it would just be the 2 of us but no, miss Davies couldn't say no to Spencer and now I've no idea what to wear!

''Chill Ash! It's just a double date. Nothing to worry about...you can always go naked you know.'' I look at Taylor and she had this big smirk on her face. I know what she's thinking about.

''Eww Tay! Not tonight...so how are things between you and that Jordan chick?'' I asked while still searching for something to wear tonight.

''Good...I'm seeing her tonight actually.''

''Cool...so where did you met her?'' I asked curiously

''At the studios. She works there as Mike's assistant.''

''Really?! Thats awesome.''

''I know and tomorrow you're gonna see her at the studio.''

''okay cool...YES! This one is perfect!'' I finally found something perfect to wear tonight

''That's hot ash!''

''I know I know...'' my phone ringed and I checked who it was ''...oh it's Aiden...well I gotta go now Tay. Have fun with Jordan and...don't make out on the couch please?!'' I said with a pout

''It's my couch too you know!''

''yeah...i know.'' I gave Taylor a hug before I went down to Aiden.

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''Hey babe.'' I said to Aiden as he leaned down and gave me a kiss.

''Hey to you too. Come or else we're late.''

I got in his car and we drove to the restaurant near the beach where Spencer and Jesse is waiting for us.

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We arrive in like 10 minutes later and there we saw Spencer and Jesse already sitting at a table as they were kissing each other. Ugh! I'm gonna be sick!

''Hey.'' I said while interrupting their kiss

''Hey Ash.'' Spence said as she stood up and gave me a hug and a kiss on my cheek. ''Hey Aiden, it's been along time since I've see you again.''

''yeah well I've been busy with stuff and...Ashley.'' he said and leaned to give me a peck on my lips. he's so sweet

''so this is my fiancé, Jesse.''

''Hey I'm Aiden.'' Aiden said while shaking his hand

''Nice to meet you Aiden.'' ...uhm...is this shaking thing going to end or not?! They held each other hands too long for straight guys... I think this date is going to be interesting!

''How long are you guys together?'' Jesse asked

''Well I know Aiden since we were kids. We started dating when we were in high school but that didn't go well... Let's just say we have dated on and off.'' I smiled at Aiden and then he looked at Jesse again! I mean oh my god! Does he likes Jesse or something cause he can't keep his eyes off him

''So Ashley, I heard you're making a solo album is that right?'' Jesse asked me while he's taking another bite of his food

''Yeah! I'm going to record some songs tomorrow. You can come if you want to.'' I said while hoping that Spencer would come instead of Jesse

''Oh I wish I can but I'm going to New York for business and be back next week... Maybe Spencer would like to come, would you babe?'' he asked Spencer. Ow please Spence say yes! Say yes!

''Oh yeah sure, I'd love too.'' YES!! thank you Jesse!

''Great. I'll pick you up tomorrow then so we can go together.''

''Okay great.'' I smiled at her as the 2 boys still talking to each other as they were bff's or something.

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''I need to go to the bathroom.'' I said to the boys but still they were talking to each other about Basketball and boys stuff.

''me too.'' Spencer said as she walks behind me

''okay.'' was all I hear from the boys

in the bathroom...

''So... the boys can get along with each other huh?!'' I said while washing my hands

''Yeah...look Ash, theres something I wanna tell you.''

''okay shoot.''

''I think Jesse is gay.'' What?! Haha! I got the feeling about that since the beginning!

''hehe... You think?'' I asked her

''Well...i don't know. I mean the way he looks at boys or the way he looks at Aiden!'' What?! My Aiden...gay?! No...impossible...oh well maybe he can be gay

''Spence, listen to me, if he's gay then why did he asked you to marry with him?''

''I don't know... you're right. I'm just being silly.''

''hehe...it's kinda funny.''

''Oh really?!'' with that she splash water in my face ''now thats funny!'' Oh no she didn't!

''Oh you think?'' I said as I splash water in Spencers face ''you're right...it is funny!''

''Oh no you didn't!''

''Yes I did!'' I said as I splash more water at Spencer. We laugh and laugh until we stopped and looked into each other eyes. I took a hair from Spencers face and put it behind her ears.

''You're so beautiful.'' I said while keeping my hand on Spencers cheek

''You too.'' she came closer and her lips are inches away from mine. She licked her lips and lean to kiss me. Her lips are so soft like silk. I pushed her gently to a wall near us and kissed her passionately.

After a few minutes she pulled back as I look into her crystal blue eyes.

''Ash I can't do this... I'm engaged now.''

''I know...but why do you keep kissing me?'' I'm hurt again by Spencer. She was the one who always kissed ME! And afterwards she pulls back again. Leaving me hurt. This sucks!

''I think we should get back.'' she leaves the bathroom and went back to our table. I walked behind her while fixing my clothes cause it's all wet.

''whoa...what happened to you two?!'' Aiden asked

''Nothing...it's just...Spencer splash water at me.'' I said to Aiden with a pout and he lean in to give me a kiss on my lips. I looked at Spencer and whoa she kinda looks jealous when Aiden kissed me. i like it!

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The date is almost over and I haven't talked to Spencer. Jesse and Aiden were the one who keeps talking this whole double date about random boys stuff as i sit there eating my food. Not making any eye contacts with Spencer.

''So Aiden, shall we go now? I don't wanna be late tomorrow.''

''Uh...sure.''

''okay great! Bye Spence'' I said and gave her a hug ''I'll see you tomorrow. And bye Jesse...it was nice to see you again.''

''Likewise Ashley. And Aiden, it was nice to meet you.'' he said, smiling at Aiden.

''You too Jesse.'' ugh! Guys!

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So Aiden drop me at my apartment and I went right to my room. I haven't seen Taylor yet so she's probably with Jordan.

It's late and I can't sleep. I was thinking about Spencer the whole time. That girl knows how to make me feel happy and sad at the same time.

I stood up from my bed and grab my guitar. Maybe a song would make me feel better.

I strum the guitar and had this melody...maybe I should write a song about her.

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**(A/N: so what did you think about this chapter? Review people review! It makes me smile and post sooner! Haha lol! **

**Love ya! XOXO)**


	4. Thinking of you

**(A/N: thank you all so much for the reviews! Hope you'll enjoy this one)**

_The music starts playing as I waited for her to walk down the aisle. _

_God, she looks so beautiful. I can't believe I'm going to get marry with her. _

_She came closer and the more she gets closer, the more my heart starts to beat faster. _

_I can't believe this is actually going to happen. The girl who I'm going to marry with, the girl that makes my heart skip a beat, the girl who I'm in love with is, Spencer._

''Wake up sleepy head! We're gonna be late.''

''What the fuck Taylor! I just had an amazing dream.''

''About what? Let me guess, Spencer?''

''Yes and I keep having this dream about me and Spence getting married. I just don't know what to do Tay.''

''Just talk to her Ash. Maybe then you two can work things out.''

''Ok, I'll talk to her. She's coming to the studio with me anyways so that will be the perfect moment to talk to her.''

''Good, now get your ass up and get dress. I'll see you later at the studio.''

''Wait! where are you going? I thought you were coming with me.''

''Well I'm gonna pick up Jordan first so I'll see you later then.''

''Oh, so you want to get some first and then go to work huh?'' I said with a smirk on my face

''Oh yes!... Hehe I'll see you later.''

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I called Spencer and said that I would be there in ten minutes. So I drove to Spencer and there outside her house she was already, standing in front of her house, waiting for me.

''Now are you getting in my car or do you want to stand there the whole day?''

''From my fiancé, I'm not suppose to get in a car with a stranger.'' she said looking so cute like a 6 year old kid

''So now I'm a stranger?!... Okay that's it. Bye Spence...''

''Wait!'' she gets in my car ''now happy? I don't want to be alone now Jesse is away for a week.''

''Aw Spence, I'm always there for you when you need someone you know.'' I said, giving her a warm smile

''Yeah I know, thats why I love you for that.'' did she just said she loves me? Oh god! No air! Breathe Ashley, breathe

''You..you love me?''

''I...ofcourse...in a friend way.'' and now my day is totally ruined!

''Oh..ok.'' I said disappointed ''we should probably go.''

''Oh Ash...you know I can't. Just let it go. Move on and forget about it.''

''yeah I don't want to be late.'' I said, ignoring everything what Spencer just said. I can't believe her! How many times did this girl hurt me without even noticing it?

xxxxx

The whole ride was awkward and silent. Nobody said something until we arrived.

''Hey I know this place! My friend works here.''

''Really?...maybe we'll see her around.''

We went to Taylors department and there she was waiting for us.

''Hey Spencer! Nice to see you again.''

''Likewise Taylor.'' Spence said giving a warm smile to Taylor. She's so sweet

''Okay Ash, you're ready?''

''Yeah I'm ready. Let's do it! Spence you okay with waiting?''

''Yeah sure, no problem. Besides I came here to watch you sing right? Now good luck and make some records!'' aw I can't stay mad or disappointed at her...she's to cute for that

I smiled at her with one of my nose crinkles and I know that she's melting right now. She loves it when I do that

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I've record 1 song now and we're having a break.

''Gosh Ash, you were amazing! And I love that song! It's amazing.''

''Well yeah...i know. You like the song huh? Wait until you hear the next one. You will love it! ...and by the way, thank you for coming with me.''

''No problem, I like it here...with you''

There she goes again. Saying so sweet things to me and then afterwards leaving me hurt.

Our eyes were locked into each others. I know I shouldn't do this but all I want right now is just lean in to her and kiss her.

''Hello lovebirds.'' Thank you Taylor!

''Oh my god! Spencer! What are you doing here?'' and Jordan!

''Jordan, you know her?'' Taylor asked. Dude! Now I'm confused

''Hell yeah I know her. She's my best friend!''

''J! I didn't know you know Ashley and Taylor.'' So confused

''Actually I'm dating Taylor.''

''Oh so you're that girl Taylor!''

''Yes I am.'' Taylor said proudly

''W-wait! I'm confused! you 2 know each other...so that means Jordan is your friend you were talking about right Spencer?''

''Yeah that's right.'' major head deck

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so when the four of us were talking and getting to know each other more better, Mike came over to us saying the break is over and time to work.

''Spence wait until you hear this one, you will love it.'' I said leaving an excited Spencer behind

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''Taylor I don't want to do that song anymore.''

''Why not Ash?''

''Last night I wrote a song about Spencer and I know you will love this song too so please let me record this one. Please?''

''Uh...okay. What do you need?''

''Nothing, only a guitar and thats it...Thank you Tay.''

''Your welcome and ...make mama proud!'' I soo love her!

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Okay Ashley, calm down. She will love it. Just sing it!

I strum the guitar as Taylor give me a sign to start

_Comparisons are easily done  
Once you've had a taste of perfection  
Like an apple hanging from a tree  
I picked the ripest one  
I still got the seed _

_You said move on  
Where do I go  
I guess second best  
Is all I will know _

She's standing there right now. Here it comes...

_Cause when I'm with him  
I am thinking of you  
Thinking of you  
What you would do if  
You were the one  
Who was spending the night  
Oh I wish that I  
Was looking into your eyes _

She's smiling, that must be a good sign

_You're like an Indian summer  
In the middle of the winter  
Like a hard candy  
With a surprise center  
How do I get better  
Once I've had the best  
You said there's  
Tons of fish in the water  
So the waters I will test _

_He kissed my lips  
I taste your mouth  
He pulled me in  
I was disgusted with myself_

Now I'm strumming harder and let my feelings out

Cause when I'm with him  
I am thinking of you  
Thinking of you  
What you would do if  
You were the one  
Who was spending the night  
Oh I wish that I  
Was looking into...

You're the best  
And yes I do regret  
How I could let myself  
Let you go  
Now the lesson's learned  
I touched it I was burned  
Oh I think you should know

i sing it from the bottom of my heart

_Cause when I'm with him  
I am thinking of you  
Thinking of you  
What you would do if  
You were the one  
Who was spending the night  
Oh I wish that I  
Was looking into your eyes  
Looking into your eyes  
Looking into your eyes  
Oh won't you walk through  
And bust in the door  
And take me away  
Oh no more mistakes  
Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay... _

WOW! that felt amazing!

I look at the people who's standing behind the window...speechless. They don't move just standing there.

I looked at Spencer and I can see in her eyes that she's about to cry. So I ran to her. Saying quick thank you's the people who's saying all those nice and amazing things about the song that I just sang.

xxxxxxx

''Spencer wait!''

''I'm sorry Ash. I just can't.''

''Okay just listen alright...I thought you would like the song. It's about you and you know how I feel about us.''

''Ash stop! There is no us.''

''Exactly! Thats what I mean. You say things that a normal friend wouldn't say, you kiss ME and then leave me hurt behind... That's just fucked up Spence. Don't play with my heart.''

''I'm not...i...just can't stay away from you Ash. ...i...i love you.''

**(A/N:okay have to stop here people! Song is from Katy Perry- Thinking of you. I love Katy Perry! **

**So please review and tell me what you think about this chapter. **

**sorry if it's rush and for the wacky ending :( just wanted to update soon. xoxo)**


	5. She cried, we kissed, she left

**sorry for the long wait! Heres the new chapter and thank you all for the reviews ;)**

**x**

_''I love you.'' _those three little words makes my heart melt. Why can't she just be with me? Why does things always have to go like this?

''You what?''

''I love you Ashley! I always have. But you and me, it can't. I'm sorry. But that song you wrote for me, it...it was amazing.'' she smiled and cried at the same time. It hurts to see her like this. ''That song was the most sweetest thing anyone have ever done for me.'' tears were pouring down her face. I don't want her to cry. I just wanted her to realize how much she meant for me.

''Spence please don't cry. I hate seeing you like this... I never meant to hurt you. I just wanted you to realize that you mean a lot to me.'' I took a few step closer to her. So close that I can almost kiss her. She's standing right in front of me. Should I kiss her?... or maybe I should back off or something. ''Spencer look at me. Why can't we be together? You know I love you, I really do.'' I put my arms around her neck so I can pull her closer to me.

''Ash, I can't okay?! This is not a movie. This is real life.''

''Like I didn't know that... Spencer listen, remember that kissing scene we did last week?...i kissed you like it was real, like it wasn't just a make out scene! It was about 2 lost people who finally find their ways in each other. I found my way Spence... I know what I want. And what I really want right now is...you!'' I leaned in to her and kissed her. Feeling her lips makes me feel like i was in heaven. I kissed her gently and passionately, showing her how much I love her, how much I need and want to be with her. Our kisses were never rough. There was no need for it. I wanted her to know that I will take care of her and love her for the way she is. The weird thing is, I was the one who kissed her first. Now the roles has change. I pulled her closer to me. I love being so close to her. She gives me this warm feeling every time I'm around her. As much as I want to kiss her forever, a girl needs some air right?!

''Spence...'' I said while my forehead is resting on Spencer's.

''Yeah?''

''Please don't marry Jesse.'' I look right in her eyes. Begging her for not marrying him. She didn't say anything though. She release herself from my arms and walked towards the elevator. She didn't look back or said anything. I know that this was the end. She made her choice. Leaving me is her choice.

xxxx

I was on my way to the set. Until I got a phone call from my sister who's in college. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention I had a sister! Well hehe... a half sister. When my parents were divorced, daddy got a girlfriend and she got pregnant. So yeah that's what happened.

''Missed me?''

''Oh my god Eileen! Of course I missed you! I haven't talked or see you in years!''

''Gosh Ash, don't be such a drama queen! I saw you last month and talked to you 2 days ago.''

''Well yeah...but that doesn't mean I don't miss you!''

''You're right! I missed you too sis! So what have you been up to?''

''Oh nothing much...drama you know.''

''Oh is this about Spencer?''

''How did you know that?!''

''Ash, I know everything. So what happened?''

''Uhm...i wrote a song for her, record it 2 days ago. She cried, we kissed, she left.''

''Wow! Interesting. Are you okay? I know this must be hard for you. You really love her do you?''

''I'm fine. And yeah, I really do love her. But she made her choice. I asked her not to marry Jesse and she left me without a word!''

''Ouch! That sucks! But maybe she has a reason for marrying Jesse. It's so obvious she wants you!''

''I don't know El, I'm sick and tired of all her games you know. She loves me, kiss me then leave me. What a happy drama isn't it?!''

''Aww...i feel so bad for you.''

''Thanks. But I have to hang up now El. I'll talk to you later okay?''

''yeah yeah. Bye sis! Love you!''

''Love you too El.''

I arrived at the set of South. This is going to be so awkward. Spencer was already there.

''Ashley, we need you on set 3.'' Thats Tom. He's the creator of South. Without him there was no South!

''Yeah I'll be there!''

I looked at Spencer. She was getting ready for our next scene. She didn't even looked at me or said 'hey how are you? I'm sorry for yesterday and blablabla' no, she was ignoring me.

I was ready to do my next scene. Thank god it's not a scene I had to do with Spencer. Or else it would be so awkward!

xxxx

I have done all my scenes for today. Some of them I had to do with Spencer but luckily it went right. She's still ignoring me though. Didn't say anything unless she had to.

''So you're tired?'' Madison asked me. She is one of my co-stars on South and such a good friend!

''No, I'm not. Just having a big head deck.''

''From what?''

''Everything. My life is pretty messed up right now.''

''I know how that feels like.''

''You do?''

''Yeah I do. You just have to relax and don't think about it you know. Let the pain go away and live your life just the way you want it to be.''

''Hey you guys! Listen!'' Thats Kyla. Always the happy one around here. She's also one of my co-stars on South.

''yeah we're listening...''

''You know Spencer's birthday is coming up right?'' that remembers me that Spencer's birthday is coming up soon this week or something.

''When is it?''

''Tomorrow!''

''Tomorrow?!'' I said out loud, shocking

''Whats tomorrow?'' And there comes Spencer. I knew I shouldn't say that out loud! Stupid me!

''Uhm...my dog is getting his new...belt.'' haha Ky knows how to change from subjects in a goofy way!

''Aww that's cute! What's his name?'' Spencer asked. This going to be hard cause I know Kyla doesn't have a dog.

''Uhm...'' she looked at me and Madison. Thinking of a name that fits a dog...

''Skippy!'' I said when the rest is looking at me confusedly

''Yeah that's his name, Skippy.''

''Aww well I wish I had a dog. They're so cute!'' she walked away from us. Now we can finally talk.

''Skippy?! What were you thinking?!'' Mads asked me

''I don't know. I used to have a dog named Skippy when I was little.''

''Okay thats all cute and stuff but let's move on to what I was talking about. Spencer's birthday! I think we should make a surprise party or something.''

''Yeah that would be a great idea!''

''But where are we having it?'' I asked. The 2 girls looked at each other then back to me.

''At your place!'' they both said.

''What?! Why me?''

''Cause you're close to Spencer. She definitely won't say no if you ask her tomorrow to drop by your house or something.''

''Uhm...i don't know about that.'' how am I going to convinced her to come if she's ignoring me?!

''Okay here's the deal, we invite some friends of her and of course her fiancé...''

''I don't think he would come.'' I interrupt Kyla.

''Why not?''

''Cause his out of town for business.''

''Oh...and her family?''

''They live in Ohio or something. She never talks about her family though.''

''Then were done for now. Ash, you pick Spencer up and we'll take care of the rest.''

''Okay sounds good to me.''

No it doesn't! I don't think Spencer would come to my place after what happened.

xxxx

The next day I, of course had to work on the set with Spencer. I really hope I can convinced her to come to my place.

''Hey Spence.''

''Hey Ash.'' thank god! She's not ignoring me again.

''Okay first of all...Happy Birthday Spence!'' I hugged her

''Aww thanks Ash.''

''Do you have plans for tonight?''

''Actually...No''

''So you wanna chill out tonight at my place? Or do you want to be alone on your birthday?'' I asked. My fingers are crossed. Please say yes!

''Uhm...Jesse is out of town...'okay sure, I would like to come.'' mission number 1 complete!

''Great! I'll pick you up at 7 okay?''

''Okay. Is this going to be only the two of us or...''

''No, Taylor invited Jordan too. We're going to watch movies and stuff so don't worry about it.'' I cut her off. I knew what she meant. If I said it would just be the 2 of us, she wouldn't come.

''Oh okay.''

xxxx

I'm sitting alone at starbucks. It's 4 pm and I still haven't got a good present for Spencer's birthday. What should I give her? My thoughts were interrupted when I saw someone familiar. Someone I almost know my whole life... Aiden, my boyfriend!

What is he doing here? And what the hell?! He's with some dude?! I don't know this guy, but damn! He was hot as hell!

They're sitting next to the window. Should I go over there or should I just sneak away?

What the...he's touching my boyfriends hands! Okay that's it! I'm going over there!

''Aiden, baby. What are you doing here?''

''Uh...Ashley...hey.'' He's so nervous. I know him for so long and his definitely uncomfortable right now.

''I'm sorry. Let me introduce my self. Hey I'm Ashley Davies. Who are you?'' I asked the guy who's sitting across Aiden.

''I'm Dillan. Nice to meet you.''

''Likewise Dillan. Uhm...Aiden can I please talk to you in private?''

''Yeah sure.'' he stood up and walked outside with me.''be right back.''

''Who the hell is he Aiden?''

''No one. He's just a friend of mine I met at the gym.'' just a friend?!

''Just a friend? Than why is he holding your hands like that? It looks like he...'' I paused. This can't be happening right now. My boyfriend, My Aiden... Is gay?!

''Ash, I'm sorry. I should have told you this before but I didn't know how I was going to explain it to you.''

''So you're...uh...gay?'' I asked. He didn't said anything. He just nodded. ''well...I'm happy for you. He is hot though!.''

''Hehe, I know! And uh...you and Spencer?''

''Me and Spencer?!'' oh gosh he knows!

''Ash it's so obvious. I don't mind if you like her. I mean were not together anymore right?''

''No you're right. Anyways, we're having a surprise party for Spencer at my place. Wanna come?''

''It's her birthday today?'' I nodded. ''Sure I'll come. You've got a present for her?'' and there it was. I finally got an idea what I'm going to give her.

''Not yet..'' I walked away from Aiden. I know what I'm going to give her!

''Hey where are you going?'' he shout

''Nowhere! I'll see you tonight okay? Bring your man with you!'' I shouted at Aiden and walk towards a little shop nearby.

xxxx

It's almost 7 pm. I should pick up Spencer. Madison and Kyla were already here with some people I know from South. Taylor also picked up Jordan. And Aiden and Dillan arrived here 10 minutes ago. Now the only one missing is the birthday girl.

''Ash you're going to be late! Go now!'' Kyla said to me. I know it's late so I quickly drove to Spencer's house.

10 minutes later I was parked in front of her house. She opened the door and went inside my car.

''Hey birthday girl. How are you?''

''Feeling a little sick.''

''How come?'' I asked worried. I didn't want her to get sick on her birthday! So I drove back to my place.

''Well I felt like this weeks ago but it gets worst. I had to puke a lot and feeling so tired all the time.''

''Wow. Have you been to the doctor then?''

''Yes I have. They said it's just normal in my time.''

''huh? Your time?'' what time? I'm confused.

''Yeah something like that. So what are we watching tonight?'' change the subjects then!

''I don't know. Taylor and Jordan pick the movies.''

''Oh god! Jordan picked to movies?! That means were going to watch a horror movie you know?''

''Really? That sounds more like Taylor. She always watch horror movies.''

It looks like the way back was faster! We arrived faster than I thought.

''So let's go inside then shall we?'' I asked. Opening Spencer's door. I know I'm such a sweetheart! Hehe..

We went up with the lift cause I live in a apartment. In the lift, Spencer didn't look exactly good.

''Are you okay Spence?''

''Yeah I'm fine. It's just...''

The lift opened and we walked towards my front door. I unlock the door. Ready to open it. ''Spencer...Happy...''

''... I'm pregnant Ash.''

''SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY SPENCER!''

Pregnant?!

xxxx

**TADADADA! I love that tadadada! XD lol! So what did you think about this chapter? I know it's crazy right?!...Spencer's pregnant and Aiden is finally out the closet! woohoo! lfmao!! I think this is my favorite chapter! i think it's my first chapter that got over 2000 words XD LOL! tell me what you think and you know...reviews makes me post sooner. wink wink ;)**


	6. Buddy

**I'm so so sorry for not posting this sooner! School is killing me! and if theres some gramma faults or if this chapter suck, i'm sorry again. i just wanted to post this as fast as i could cuz i won't post more for the next 2 weeks :( going on camp! nay nay! but enough about my oh so happy great life.**

**this chapter is dedicated to Buddy Jr. **

**I changed the P.O.V for this chapter**

**x**

**Ashley's P.O.V.**

My heart stopped beating. Did she just said she was pregnant? Great moment to celebrate isn't it? She was surprised and I saw it on her face.

''Congratulation.'' I said. She hugged me. I don't know, should I be happy for her? I mean if she really is pregnant, the baby is Jesse's. And that's another reason for her not to be with me.

''Thank you.'' she whispered. All the guests came to her and said happy birthday. Me in the other hand stood there like I lost my brains or something. I can't deal with this now. It's Spencer's birthday. I should not make a scene here. So I went to my room where I can find some rest to clear up my head.

**Spencer's P.O.V.**

I can't believe Ashley trow a surprise party for me! And I can't believe what I just said to her! Good job Carlin! More drama.

I'm so thankful to the people who came here. Madison and Kyla where here and also Aiden. He's walking towards me. Aiden and some other guy... I don't know him. Well let's find out who he is.

''Happy birthday Spencer.'' Aiden said and gave me a hug.

''Aw thanks Aid. So, who's your friend?'' I asked. The guy was cute and tall like Aiden.

''Oh I'm Dillan. And happy birthday.'' He sounds nice

''I'm Spencer, nice to meet you and thank you for coming here too.'' I said politely. I looked around to find Ashley, but she's nowhere to find. ''Uh...have you seen Ashley?'' I asked

''No I haven't seen her. Maybe she's in her bedroom.''

''Okay thanks Aid. ''

I went to Ashley's room, but it was locked. So I knocked.

''Ash are you in there?''

''Yeah wait a minute.'' what is going on in there? Noise were coming out of her room. It's like somebody else was in there too

''Ash are you okay? ... open the door Ash!''

''Yeah I'm coming!'' Her face looked all sweaty when she opened the door.

''Are you okay? What were you doing?'' I said and went inside her room without being invited.

''Nothing. Just cleaning up and stuff.'' I looked around and all I see was a bunch of clothes on the floor and her bed was all messy.

''You mean this cleaning up?''

''Well I...''

a strange sound came out of the closet. Like someone was in there.

''What's that for noise?'' the sound was beeping. There was definitely something in there. I walked towards her closet and was ready to open it

''Wait don't!''

''Why not?''

''Because...'' she paused

''Because what?'' I asked. My patient was gone. I need to know what's inside the closet, who's inside the closet. I opened the closet door and...oh my god,

''a puppy!''

''Yeah... uh... Happy Birthday!'' She said. I picked up the little puppy who was inside a box. He was so cute! Wait... Is it a He or a She? I checked to see what it was and... it was a He! How cute! He was brown and got this cute little nose. Aw! I'm in love with him! Wait...I'm in love with a dog?!

''Thank you so much Ash! I can't think of a perfect present than this.'' I hugged the little puppy. He was so small.

''Oh it's no big deal. I remembered what you said yesterday. About that you wished you had a dog. So you have a name for him?'' I sat down on Ashley's bed with the puppy on my lap.

''I don't know. If it was a girl I would love to call her Ashley.'' I said and smiled at her. She's so nice. I still can't believe I got a dog! But I don't think Jesse would like him. I mean not that he's going to hate it. No, he is just allergic to dogs. How am I going to say this to her? Every time she does something nice for me I break her heart. And I don't want to do it again! 3 times this week is enough don't you think?!

''Uh Ash..''

''Yeah.''

''I can't keep him.'' there I said it. Feeling the guilt all over me.

''Huh? I thought you wanted a dog. You don't like him?'' yes, still feeling guilty.

''I do! I really wanted a dog and I love what you did for me but I can't keep him... Jesse is allergic to dogs.'' honestly suck!

''Oh, I'm so...''

''You don't have to apologize. It's my fault I didn't tell you about it.''

''Well actually it is my fault... I never asked.''

Right when we were having a moment, my mind is saying just not to do this anymore with her. I'm pregnant for god sakes! This child needs a father.

''So how long are you ...''

''Pregnant?'' she nodded. ''4 weeks now I guess.''

''Have you been to the doctor?''

''Yes I have. Look Ash, I'm sorry if I..''

''No it's okay.'' she cut me off ''Does Jesse know about this?''

I shake my head no. ''I'm planning to tell him when he get back.''

There's a awkward silent between us. Like we're forced to not say anything.

The little puppy is rolling around on Ashley's bed. Playing with his toy. Should I go back now? This can't be more awkward than it is now. The guests are probably waiting for me. I should be polite and go back right?

''I should probably go back to the guests.'' She didn't look at me but instead watch the pups movements. Her smile of joy just watching that little pup playing makes me feel guilty. ''You should keep him.''

''I'm sorry, what?'' now I got her attention.

''I said, you should keep him.'' she deserves him ''Besides, I can come and visit you and your buddy here right?''

''Yeah... wait, I think I just found a perfect name for this little guy'' she picked up the pup and hold him in the air. ''Buddy.''

--

After a few hours the guests left. And so was Taylor and Jordan, who couldn't keep their hands off each other! The rest of the south cast were here too. It was such a great night! I was so shocked when Ashley told me Aiden and her broke up. I know I shouldn't be happy but it makes me feel like one of the hardest thing to get is getting closer to me. And guess what...Aiden is gay! I never thought Aiden was gay. He was all so big and though. So he had a soft spot for men and the only men he wants to be with right now is probably Dillan. Yes, Ash also told me they were dating too. Funny how life can be so unpredictable.

The loft is empty now. I'm all alone with Ashley and it freaks me out! I can't trust myself when I'm around her. I could suddenly kiss her again and leave her hurt behind. Why did I say yes when Jesse ask me to marry him?! Oh yeah... I'm pregnant! I know he's going to be a great father for this kid in me, but is he going to be a great husband with all his work?

--

''You can stay over if you want.''

''Oh I...''

''It's no problem. I can sleep on the couch.'' it's already late so why not right.

''Sure it's not a problem?''

''Yeah. You'll take my bed. Trust me, it's better than Taylor's!''

''hehe, okay. And do you also have a shirt that I...''

''It's in my closet. Just pick one out.''

''Thanks Ash. Goodnight.'' I gave her one last smile before I went inside her room. I turned on the light and found Buddy sleeping on Ashley's bed. I guess he was tired too. I took off my shoes and pants and wear one of Ashley's boxers and shirt. She had the same size as me if it comes to clothes.

I'm so sleepy right now, but I can't sleep! I feel guilty to let Ashley sleep on the couch. Maybe I should...

''UGH!'' take a look...

What the... Ashley fell on the ground!

''Don't laugh! It's not funny!'' she stood up and sat on the couch. I can't help but laughing.

''I know I'm sorry. Are you hurt?''

''Yes, my elbow hurt as hell.''

I sat next to her and checked her elbow.

''Does this hurt?'' I asked

''Yeah. It'll probably be a black spot I guess. You should go back to sleep.''

''I wished I could.''

''You can't sleep either huh.'' I nodded

''Maybe I could sleep if I had some company.'' whoa! Did I just said that?

''Spence, I thought...''

''It's nothing, forget that I've ever said that.''

I went back to Ashley's room and closed the door. Carlin, you're so stupid! Why did I said that? Giving her the wrong idea's again. At least one of us can sleep. Our little Buddy is still sleeping. He's so cute! Too bad I can't keep him myself.

I closed my eyes and start counting little Buddy's. Maybe then I can fall asleep. 1 buddy, 2 buddy's, 3 buddy's, 4 buddy's. I was so focused on counting little buddy's, that I didn't realize someone was laying beside me. I opened my eyes and found brown eyes meets mine.

''Hey.'' she whispered.

''Ash, I'm so...''

''Ssh...it's okay.''

She scoot a little closer and put her hand on my stomach.

''Do you have a name for her?''

''How do you know if it's a girl? I don't even know if it's going to be a boy or girl.''

''Trust me it's a girl.''

A birthday I will never forget.

Never want to lose this moment.

Never want anything else than falling asleep in her arms.


	7. Roll it nice

**It's about time I finally post a new chapter! Sorry for the long wait. I've got a lot of things to do this last month like my weeks of exams at school and all other things. The only thing i forgot to do was updating this story i wrote for you guys. And i'm so sorry you all had to wait a month for this. In the meanwhile when i haven't got something to come up with for this story, I wrote another story but haven't finish the first chapter yet... There's so much ideas i have on my mind for stories about spashley. ****Oh and season 3b! god is it just me or is there not enough Spashley moments in 3b? **

**I don't know when i'm going to post the next chapter, i hope asap. ****Anyways... i smell some drama coming up soon. I'll shut up now. Enjoy ;)**

**--**

**Roll it nice.**

Hair all over my face. Mind confused. Feeling alone and empty. Searching for the brunette but only finds an empty spot next to me. Was this just a dream? A night I thought had placed here in this bedroom. Something I could only dream of.

''Ashley?''

the door went open and Ashley walked in with a plate of pancakes with syrup and a red rose that she's been holding between her teeth. She looked at me and smiled. She put down the plate on her bed and gave me the red rose.

''Morning sleepy head. I made breakfast for you and stole this rose from Mrs Garfield.''

''You made breakfast?''

''Yeah I know, shocking. Well get up I want to take you out for today.''

''okay, where are we going then?''

''can't tell you. But I know you will love it!''

''Ashley please...''

''No can't do. Now go eat some pancakes. I have to make a call.''

Is this wrong? I mean, staying at Ashley's and have her to make breakfast for me and take me out. Theres nothing wrong with it right?! We're going out as friends and friends can stay for the night. But we both know we're more than 'just friends'.

---

''So you got it all planned and set up?... really... how excited... no, keep your dirty minds to yourself will ya? Have you got that song I asked you about?... yes perfect! Thank you Tay, I don't know what I should do without you... Okay talk to you later.''

While taking a sip of my coffee I overheard Ashley talking on the phone with someone. She sounds so sexy when she's serious. Ugh get over her Carlin!

''So you're ready?''

''Yes I am. Who were you talking to?''

''Oh just Taylor. She's staying with Jordan. Let's go Buddy!'' she held the little pup in her arms and grab her car keys

''Cute.''

''I know right. He got this little cute nose.'' she said pointing at buddy's nose ''yes you have.'' she said in a childish tone

''I wasn't talking about Buddy''

---

''So what does he needs more?''

We're at Aiden's now. Buddy is going to stay with him when we're off to dream land... or something. I have no idea what Ashley is planning today. If I ask her, she says I should not be so impatient.

''Take him out for a walk or something. Just take care of him will you?''

''Hey Aid, do you have... company''

Dylan? What is he doing here? Did they... oh god they did! In front of us, a tall brunette guy in his boxers and shirtless! ''Oh I'm sorry, I should probably go...''

''No, stay. We were just asking Aiden if he could take care of buddy when we're going out for today. So we should probably go.'' she gave Aiden a hug ''well done boyfriend.'' she whispered, but the look on Dylan's face means he heard it. ''Come one.'' she says and grab my hand, leading me outside

---

''Why don't you just tell me?'' we're driving and driving. Heck no I don't know where we're going! This girl won't say a thing!

''Because, it's a surprise. You whine to much you know.'' she thinks I whine to much? Well... I don't. Just curious. ''oh we're almost there.'' she said and took the left road.

Is this the place? An old left apartment? A building with graffiti on the walls and stairs that needs to be fixed. And did I say old? I though it would be something... nicer? I guess this day really is special...

''So what do you think?''

''Uh...whoa... I didn't... expect this?''

''I know. Come on. There's a surprise for you inside the building.''

We went inside the apartment and took the elevator. Elevator? I didn't know they had an elevator inside this building.

''What are you doing?''

''You have to close you eyes or else it won't be that fun anymore.''

she said and stood behind me with her hands covering my eyes ''It's not going to be a surprise party, is it?''

''No, it isn't. You'll see.''

after a bell, the elevator went open ''well that's going to be easy if I could open my... whoa..'' a room filled with so much warmth. A song is playing in the background and roses on the floor guide us to a table in the center of this room. I had to giggle when I saw what the menu is for today. Chinese delivery. And of course, candles on the table as well. ''Gosh I can't believe this. You've done this?'' she nodded

''You like it? I didn't know what to do so I asked Taylor what to do and she told me I just had to do something easy but special and...'' then it hit me. I'm standing in front of her. Lips touching each other and it felt right. I kissed her and it felt right. No guilt. It's like I finally did what I really wanted to do. I kissed her. ''...nice.'' opening my eyes, I found beautiful brown eyes locked on mine.

''You talk too much when you get nervous you know that?''

''just shut up and kiss me already'' and so I did.

My hands on her waist and lips wanting more. Feel nothing else than this tender kiss. Pulling her closer to me, her tongue trace my lips, begging for entrance.

''Nice!'' a girl voice came from behind me. Breaking us kiss, I turn around to see who it was. ''ouch! That hurts.'' deserving a slap from my best friend...

''I'm sorry girls. Miss horny here couldn't keep her mouth shut.'' Jordan! ''We'll let you two alone.'' walking to the door and back again to drag the horny Taylor out. ''once again we're sorry for interrupting.''

''No, it's okay. We're used to it.'' She said and grinned at me.

When I though they were going to leave, Taylor came back. ''The keys my lady...'' giving Ashley the keys she lean and whispered in Ashley's ear. ''and by the way... '' the rest I couldn't hear. Trying to understand why Ashley's face is turning red by what Taylor is saying to her.

''you sick pig!''

''Well thank you, if you think of me that way.'' having no idea where the conversation was about, I heard Jordan shouting 'Taylor!' from the hallway. ''Good luck girl. Don't forget to call me okay? Bye Spence.'' giving Ash a last wink before walking away ''I'm coming dear...''

''That was... nice?''

''Yes it was. So are you hungry, cause I'm starving!''

''Actually, I am.''

''Good, let's order Chinese then.''

---

''So who lives here?'' taking a bite of my noodles

''Mike. You know the owner of the studio. He's Taylor's brother and out of town. So I asked her if I could use his apartment.'' did you know eating with sticks was hard? Have you tried it? I tried to eat my noodles with it, but it keeps falling down! And yes, you probably think 'Carlin, why don't you just use a fork?'

She's staring at me. Smiled when I looked up. ''what?''

''Come, I want to show you something.'' I took her hand as she lead us ''This is why I chose this place to be like our first date.'' she let go of my hand and opened the curtains from the big window in front us

I can't believe an old apartment like this would have such and amazing view. I walk closer to the big window and look outside. The sunset is fading and from here you can see the Willow park. ''It's amazing! Ash this is so beautiful.''

''I know. And for the cherry on top, I have something for you.'' I look back at her, she was taking something out of her pocket ''I didn't know what else to give, so I just made this a couple of days ago as an birthday gift for you. Than there was Buddy and all those stuff. Didn't get the right moment to give it to you.''

She took my arm and put on a silver bracelet. It was small and had a small tag on it. ''Spashley?''

''Well yeah. I know it sounds cheesy and stuff, but I was thinking about this name a lot since the day we talked about... you know... us.''

''How could I have ever forget it. I hurt you on that day. I broke your heart. And still you give this to me? I can't accept this.''

''Yes you can. It's just a friendship bracelet. Nothing wrong right?''

But this is wrong! I'm engaged to a lovely man, I'm pregnant and I'm so confused! I can't hurt Ashley anymore. She doesn't deserve this. She doesn't deserve me! ''Look Ash, I...''

_I thought I could resist you. I thought that I was strong. Somehow you were different from what I've known... _''shh...'' she hushed me ''Spencer Carlin, can I have this dance?''

I nodded and took her hand. One hand behind her neck and one holding hers.

_I didn't see you coming. You took me by surprise and you stole my heart before I could say no. _We were swaying along with the music. Loving every millisecond of this moment.

_Falling head over heels, Thought I knew how it feels. But with you it's like the first day of my life. You leave me speechless, when you talk to me. You leave me breathless, the way you look at me. You manage to disarm me. My soul is shining through. I can't help but surrender, my everything to you..._

''Ash, I want to go home.''

''You sure?'' I nodded ''okay then. Let's clean this mess up so we can go.''

---

''Thanks for today Ash. Goodnight.'' I got out of her car

''Wait! I'll walk with you.'' she got out of her car and walked beside me.

Standing in front of my door, I searched for the keys in my purse to unlock the door. ''You wanna come in?'' I asked

''Uh... sure.''

Once opening my door I immediately throw my keys and purse somewhere on the table. I got so overwhelmed by tonight. The date went perfect until I got this weird feeling again. Those butterflies in my stomach, those feelings you get when you're in love. Those feelings I get when I'm with Ashley. It gets to complicated for me. I do like Ashley. More in just a friend way, but what do I do now when I'm pregnant and engaged? And that song where we danced at. It's meant to be written about us. She, Ashley leave me speechless. We're standing face to face and still there hasn't come a word out of me.

''I'm sorry I wanted to come home soon. It was awesome though. Dinner with candlelights, watching the sunset fade away, our dance and this cute bracelet.'' She smiled when I shook my hand to show the bracelet ''It was amazing, Ashley.''

Her smile fade away when she began to speak ''Why did you want to come home soon?''

I knew she would ask this! ''I'm tired, that's all.''

''Come on, Spence! We both know that's not the real reason you wanted to go home quickly. You're afraid.'' I looked at her confused ''you're afraid cause you don't want to choose between Jesse and me. Spencer, don't listen to what your mind is saying. I know you think staying with Jesse is the right thing to do. It's right to everyone except yourself! What is your heart telling you?''

''My heart?''

''Yes, cause that's the one thing you forgot to use. You didn't listen to your heart. Spencer, tell me honestly you don't love me, and I will go back home and forget this whole you and me ever happened.''

Her eyes began to be blurry, or was it my eyes? ''I...'' can't get the words out of my mouth. I lowered my head down, feeling the tears coming out any moment.

''I see.'' a tear felled down her soft cheeks. She began to walk towards the door.

''Ash wait... '' I grab her arm and turned her around. On that exact moment, our lips made contact with each other. I pulled her closer and held her tighter to me. I didn't want to let her go. I... ''love you.''

Pulling back from our kiss. She opened her eyes and looked straight in mine. ''what?''

''I love you. I love you so much Ashley Davies. You have no idea what you did to me. You touched my heart.''

A smile appeared on her face. She tuck away a piece of hair behind my ear and leaned in. Just barely touching my lips ''I love you too.''

She smashed her lips against mine. My hands behind her neck so I can pull her closer. ''Room?''

Once we're in, I fell her lips places kisses on my neck and leaned me into bed. I kissed her back with so much intensity. She lay on top of me. I took my top off and she kisses me down my abs and lower to unzip my jeans. My hands under her shirt. Feeling her soft skin. She took her shirt and jeans off. ''Are you sure about this?'' she whispered between our kisses.

I took her hand and guide it down my body. ''Very.''

---

Mornings first sight. I woke up, finding my naked body tangled with hers. Her hair all over her face. She looked so adorable asleep. I tuck away her hair and kissed her lips. ''Morning sleepy head.''

She opened her eyes and smiled at me. ''you okay?'' she asked with a husky voice

''Yeah I guess. Are you?''

''Always when I'm with you.'' She lean in to give me a kiss, but that turned out into a make-out session with me straddling her. Moans filled the room as I can feel her naked skin against mine. ''hmm... what's that?''

''What is what?'' I can feel her tongue massage mine. My hands went down to her breast and I can hear her moan slightly.

''That... noise...'' I start to kiss her neck but my hands were still on the exact spot. ''shh... seriously Spence. I think someone just came in.''

''The only one who's coming... '' I lowered my hand down to her body where I guarantee her some pleasure. ''is you...''

''Spencer? Honey, I'm home.'' Fuck!


	8. Close to the end

**I know i suck. I'm sorry. Tomorrow last South episode. I think i'm gonna cry :(**

**- **

**Close to the end.**

**Ashley's P.O.V. **

''Fuck! What do we do now?'' She quickly get off of me. I searched for my clothes that I throw somewhere last night. ''oh god this is not happening!'' We both heard footsteps coming closer ''Quick! Get in the closet!'' she said softly. I did what she said. Walking with my clothes in my hands and yes... still naked. Do you imagine it? ''Stay here until he's out of sight okay?'' I nodded.

''Spencer?'' I heard the door went open

''Jesse baby, I didn't hear you come in.'' baby? Seriously Spence.

''You missed me?'' I sneak a peek from the closet doors opening. Gawd... it's freezing. Well that's what you get when you're hiding naked in a closet after a smoking hot night. I want to go back time when I was still laying in bed with Spencer. Damn, that girl knows how to make me smile.

He walked over to Spencer and gave her a hug and ... eww a kiss? ''I thought you were coming back next week?''

''Well I got the deal! They're offering me the job!'' oh happy day!

''Honey, that's great!''

''I know right. So why are you in your bathrobe?'' oh no he knows!

''Uh... I wanted to take a shower.'' very nice Spence! Trying to put my clothes on one by one, I dropped my bra! I tried to grab it but it's too dark to see. _Ouch!_

''What was that?'' Fuck! The clothes hangers fell. Oh please don't let him come here Spence...

''What is what?''

''The sound that came from the closet.''

''What sound? I didn't hear a sound. Jesse you're probably tired, why don't you just take a shower or something?''

''Uh... Okay then. But weren't you going to take shower too?''

''Yes I was, but I can take a shower later. You go.''

''You know...'' I almost got it... yes! Found the bra! What the hell is that jerk doing? With his hands all over Spencer. ''we could take a shower together... If you want.'' guys are so predictable. Like Spencer wants to take a shower with that douche, yeah right!

''Uh... okay. You go and let the water run.''

''Great! Let me grab a towel.'' Oh no! He's coming here...

''No! No, I'll take it. You just go let the water stream, okay?'' he nodded and went inside the bathroom. I heard the water flowing in the bathtub and the sound of a closing door.

I almost got everything on when the closet door flew open ''He's in the bathroom. Hurry up or he'll get out.'' I nodded and grab my shoes.

''Spencer, you coming?''

''what a douche.'' I said softly.

''Shh...'' she hushed me and gave me that weird look she has when she's not getting something. ''Uh yes honey, I'll be right there.''

Opening the front door, I had to ask her something ''Was this it?''

''I don't know. Maybe?'' she grab my hand and played with my fingers as she always does when she doesn't know what else to say ''I don't know what to do Ash.''

''Spence, it's your choice. You want to stay with him, I understand. You're pregnant. But don't think I will ever stop loving you or try to even hold you.'' I tangled our hands and looked at her ''or stop fighting for you.''

''I should go now or else he gets suspicious. I'll see you next week?''

I let out a big sigh and nodded. She let go of my hand and closed the door. Can this be more confusing?

--

I drove home and knew what's going to come. I didn't have to grab my keys or the door just flew open with an exciting Taylor waiting for me to come in. I walked in with a not so happy smile on my face ''Not now Tay.''

''What no details?'' I sat on the couch with my head down. ''Okay, fine. But at least tell me why you're so down.'' she sat next to me

''I don't know Tay. This whole situation I'm dealing with is getting harder and harder. How can I let this happen? She's fucking pregnant!''

''Wait wait, Spencer's pregnant?'' she asked confusedly.

I nodded and start to explain it all. ''She's pregnant for like a month now. And don't forget, she's also engaged to Jesse.'' I lowered my head down ''What have I done? I let her cheat with me.''

She held me in her arms and that's how we stayed for a couple of minutes. I thought I would be happy after showing Spencer my love. But instead I feel so guilty. What have Jesse done wrong to me? Nothing!

--

This last few days I've been kinda down. Stayed inside even though the sun is shining bright full. I have been avoiding Spencer a couple of days now. She tried to call me, but I let it ring. She came to see me, I said I was busy. Now I have to face her at work. She would probably ask me all kinds of questions like 'where have you been all week?' or 'why didn't you answer your phone?' Trust me, I know to the question 'why'. Why? Because of a tall blond guy who seemed to be going a dad in a couple of months. I've ruined the perfect idea of a 'normal' family. If Jesse ever find out about this, he would be devastated.

When I arrived at the set, I saw a blond girl rushing towards me. She grab my hand and lead me to her trailer. ''Where have you been all week?''

I told you she would ask me this. ''Home.''

''Then why didn't you call me back?''

''I guess I forgot? Look Spence, I'm not in the mood of this. Let's just...''

''Spencer?'' we both turned our heads to the door where a blond guy just entered in. ''Oh hi Ash.'' I just nod and look down at my shoes.

''Jesse, can you please wait outside? I wanted to talk with Ashley about some things.''

''Oh were you going to tell her?''

''Tell me what?'' I said, looking up confused.

''Well, tell her Spence.'' he walked over to Spencer and put his arm around her waist.

''I uh... we're uh...'' is it just me or does talking normally seems to be hard these days?

''We're having a baby!'' says the baby itself. As if I didn't know that. I looked at Spencer when she tries to avoid eye-contacts with me. Looks like the roles has changed.

''Oh my god, Congrats.'' I said and hugged the poor guy. ''You both are going to be amazing parents.'' taking a glance on Spencer, I smiled and made my way to the door. ''I'll see you later on set.''

--

''Next scene, Gabby and Mandy's night alone.'' We sat close on the couch with my hand around Spencer and our hands entwined.

We have to do our scene, which is where we kiss and dance. ''This reminds me of something.'' she whispered in my ears that send shivers down my body. I was enjoying the warmth feeling of Spencer Carlin.

''Everything set? Action!''

As she leaned to kiss me, I was just too nervous of doing it in front of her fiancé. It's just too awkward. ''It's okay.'' she whispered and cupped my face. The moment our lips touched, there was no need to be nervous again.

Then it was time for some acting. ''So are you serious, you're not mad at me?''

''No please. If our relationship cannot survive a few slutty embarrassing moments, then what's the point?''

''I guess it's true.'' she said

''I have something for you. But it's a couple weeks late.''

''Is it my birthday present?'' she asked cheerfully

''Yes it's your birthday present.'' I stood up ''Okay well it's kinda cheesy and romantic, but I wrote this for you. And I was gonna play it live, but I was afraid that I was gonna mess it up or you were gonna make me laugh. So I record it.'' I pressed the play button on the CD player and the music fills the room. A big flashback, don't you think? It's like I'm reliving my date with Spencer! I reached my hand out to take her for a dance. My hands around her waist and her hands around my neck. We move slowly with the song. From right to left but my hands still on the right place. She pulled me closer and putted her head on my shoulder. A strange feeling appeared when I saw Jesse standing on the other side of the set with his head down. He looked sad for a men that's expecting a child.

''And Cut!''

--

Another break. Another 20 sick minutes watching Spencer and Jesse getting all cozy. Can't this day be worse? Looking at the girl who seems to be unhappy in his arms.

''You okay?''

I look up to see who it was ''I guess.'' Madison.

She took the seat next to me. ''Come on, spill it. I know there's something up in that small head of yours.''

''Have you ever been in love?'' I asked

''Yes, why?''

''Have you ever been heart broken?''

''Yes I did. That's a part of life. Why all this questions? Is this about someone I know?'' she asked curiously

''Well does this 'someone' has a name?''

''Oh jee, I don't know. Maybe it starts with an S and ends with pencer?''

''So you know about it?''

''Girl, it's so obvious. Everybody knows about you and Spencer. The way you two look at each other. Or even finish each others sentences. You two belong together. Even a newborn baby won't make a change to that.'' she said, pointing at the couple who just went inside their trailer.

''But what can I do?''

''Have you talked to her?'' I nodded. Why does everyone thinks a good talk would help? ''Have you showed her your love?'' I nod again ''Then you just have to wait. She'll come to you when she's ready.''

I hope she'll be ready soon, cause I don't think I could wait that long.

--

Finally, we're done for today. I did some scenes with Spencer, but not as much as I used to. Things change for some reason.

Ready to go home, I bump in to someone I truly don't want to talk to actually.

''Ashley, hi.''

''Hi to you too, Jesse.''

''So uh, you're going home?''

''Well yeah if I didn't bump in to someone, i would probably be in my car right now. Where is Spencer?''

''She's still in her trailer. Anyways, good that I bump into you. I wanted to ask you something. I have this last call from the office. They wanted my project ideas file on paper, which I forgot to give yesterday. But now I can't drive back home to drop Spencer off. So I was wondering if you could drive her home, please?'' he asked as his life depend on it

''Yeah sure. Why not.''

''Thank you so much.'' he said relieved ''Lucky she still has you now.''

''What do you mean by that she still has me?'' I asked confusedly

''Oh, haven't she told you?'' I shook my head as a big no. ''We're moving back to Ohio.''

--

Those words. Those stupid words. It's stuck in my head. Like a stupid song I heard on the radio. How could she? She'll be away in a month. Only 30 days left for me to say goodbye to her. How can this even happening? Now my life gets even worse than it already is. Ohio? Isn't that where she's from?! She leaves this sunny LA for a farm sheep in Ohio? Dude, I get the point she'll get married in a couple of months, but seriously, that guy is such a douche! He leaves her to me so he can go off to his work. What a douche. But don't get me wrong, he's cool though. He just don't get it himself. He seemed to love his work more than Spencer. Oh and there she is. Spencer. I told her Jesse the douche couldn't drive her home because he was so busy with his work. It's freaking 5 pm. That dude needs a life.

I parked my car in front of her house. This whole ride was filled with a completely silence. Just me and my mind talking and with Spencer looking out the window.

''Thanks for driving me back home.'' she said and undo her seatbelt. ''I'll see you tomorrow okay?''

I was just staring at the window in front of me. My mind is saying a lot of things that I don't know where to start talking about. It's now or never. ''No, not okay. We need to talk.''

Seriously.


	9. Wrong Track

**HAPPY NEW YEAR! i hope you all had a blast of a holiday. Sorry if this chapter's too short or maybe... i don't know, it didn't turn out the way i wanted it to be. The next one will be longer and better i promise ya'll ;)) And thank you all for the great reviews! I love them all!**

**In this chapter: see how Spencer deals with the news Jesse brought her and ofcourse 'the talk' **

**_Italic_ parts are the past**

**Enjoy ;)**

**-**

**Wrong track.**

**Spencer's P.O.V.**

Choices. That's something I have to think about. Like when I moved to Los Angeles just to become another girl who's hoping to be an actress in Lala Land. My family never approve me to move to Los Angeles without them though. Especially my mom, Paula Carlin. She couldn't stand the fact that I didn't want to be an surgeon like she was. My dad was cool though. After awhile he approves me to go to Los Angeles to chase after my dream. And look where I stand right now. But all that is going to be over when my dear fiancé broke the news for me.

_I was heading out the door to meet Jordan at café Lilies when Jesse blockade my way out. _

_''Do you have a moment?'' _

_''Yeah sure.'' _

_''I need to tell you something very important. Remember when you said how much you missed your family back in Ohio?'' I nodded ''Well...you know I got that new job right?'' I nodded again. Where the hell is this going? ''I know this might come unexpected, but the job is in Ohio.'' _

_''So your going to work in Ohio? What are you saying, Jesse?'' is he going to leave me now that the baby is coming?_

_''What I'm saying is... we're moving to Ohio.'' _

_''What?!'' moving back to Ohio?! Wait, that means I'm going to leave Ash-_

_''Spencer are you listening to me?'' forgot to not think about that anymore._

_''W-wait...'' I stuttered ''Are you serious, we're moving to Ohio?'' he nodded ''Jesse, what about my job? Did you even think about me when you decided to take the job?'' _

_''Honey, I did. This is a great opportunity for both of us. Your family will be there for you when the baby is coming.'' _

_I kept looking down. Maybe he's right. With the baby's coming, we have to take a few days off. ''What about my friends? I can't leave South, Jesse.'' I felt the tears wanting to burst out any moment. _

_''I know, darling. But can't you just think about it? It'll be the best way for our child to have some lovely people around him.'' _

_''Her.'' _

_''What?'' _

_''It's her.'' I said ''It's going to be a girl.'' _

_''How do you know if it's going to be a girl? Have you been to the doctor without me?'' _

_''No, I just know it would be a girl. Someone told me that.'' _

30 days. Only 30 days to go and I will say goodbye to her. Weird that I actually agreed to move to Ohio. What was I thinking?! Oh, yeah, the baby. And the wedding, which is taking place in 3 months. So that means in... 90 days, we'll say the 'yes, I do' words in front of everybody.

I wish I never started the whole love affair with Ashley. Now I can't seem to forget about it anymore.

No, I take it back. Ashley showed me how to love someone unconditional. She knows how to calm me down or make me happy.

In return I gave her nothing more than pain and suffer.

It's decision time.

Staying with Jesse is the right thing to do. For him, for the baby, for everyone.

Except for me and her.

–

I was ready to go when someone knocked on the door.

''Who is it?'' I asked

A brunette's head sneaked out the door. ''It's me.'' she said and walked in. ''I-uh, Jesse, had to go to his work and asked me to take you home.''

''Oh,'' again?! What is it with mens and jobs?

''I'll be waiting in my car.''

Before I could say anything back, she left.

The whole ride was filled with a total silence. She wasn't talking to me, neither did she look at me. I stared out the window, wanting to get out of this car as soon as possible. Awkward is the right word to say.

''Thanks for driving me back home.'' I said and undo my seatbelt. ''I'll see you tomorrow okay?'' she didn't look or said anything back.

''No, not okay. We need to talk.'' she demanded, right before I got out of the car.

''Ash, what's wrong?'' i said anxious.

She took a breath and turned to me. ''Why didn't you tell me you were going to leave?'' her eyes were... she was crying.

''Who told you that?''

''Oh so it is true. You're leaving with that jerk to Ohio. How could you, Spence? You told me you love me. You made love with me and now you just going to pack your backs and leave?''

More tears were running down her face. I didn't notice there were tears falling down my cheeks too. Everything seems to be blurry. Even her eyes that I love seems to be different.

''No! Ash, I love you. I really do. And yes I am going to move to Ohio. But that doesn't mean I don't love you anymore.'' She shook her head and closed her eyes. ''I'm going to move with Jesse. I have to. I'm carrying his baby. He got this job in Ohio. My family lives there and it's better for me and the baby to move back. They can take care of us. I'm sorry, Ashley. I was going to tell you, but I wasn't sure if I had the courage to do it.''

''You can't just take my heart and throw it away, Spence.''

''I know and I'm sorry.''

''Sorry isn't going to make it all better.''

''Ashley, you have to know that I - I made my choice. I decided to stay with him.''

She turned her face away from me and stared out the window again. Her hands grabbing the steering wheels, making her knuckles go paler. Silence fills the emptiness we have in this car. I couldn't manage to say something anymore.

After a moment she wiped away her tears and seemed to be calmer. She looked at me and took my hand in hers. ''Did you know you had 4 different smiles?'' she asked. I shook my head confusedly. ''1, when you're happy, you crinkle with your nose. 2, when you're uncomfortable with something, you twitch your lips. 3, when you're being sarcastic.'' she said in a dumb tone and laughed. ''And 4,'' I never thought she would know all these things about me.

My eyes were lost in hers. Those are the eyes I remembered to love. She leaned closer to me and cup my face. ''4 is when you're in love. Whenever you're around me I see that smile. The smile that makes me think of you. The smile I know why I'm in love with you. Spence, I know why you have to leave. You made your choice. But I can't keep doing this with you. Having an affair? That's just not me, Spence. Maybe it's for the best to move on and separate our ways.'' she took a moment of silent. ''We'll see each other at work for this few last weeks, but that's it. Just as friends and colleagues.''

''So this is it? It's really over, isn't it?''

she nodded ''I can't get you out of my mind, Spencer Carlin. And I never will.''

She lean to me and left a small kiss on my lips. Maybe it's for the best. We can't do this anymore. ''I love you, Ash.'' I said before getting out of her car.

She return me a smile. ''That's just words, Spence.'' and left.

I unlock my door and went inside. It was dark and the lights were still off. I guess Jesse's still working. I put my purse on the counter and walk to the living room.

Seeing that the red light is burning on my answering machine, I ignored it and lay on the couch.

Confused is how I feel right now. Ashley's okay with me leaving her. And I'm okay with moving back to Ohio.

Life is getting weirder and weirder when it comes to this.

So that's it. It's over between me and Ash.

I'm going to get married in 3 months with Jesse. I'm pregnant and right now I'm so irritating by the red light that keeps blinking!

I stood up and pressed the play key.

_''Hey Honey, I might be late home. So you don't have to stay up for me, kay? I love you. Bye.'' _

Of course he'll be late home. He always does.

But that's the men I chose to spend my life with. The father of my baby.

And now I wonder to myself.

Did I make the right choice?


	10. Rebound

**Woot! new chapter. This week has been gigantic for me. I got my exams tomorrow and my bestfriend recently told me he was gay. Yes, he finally came out to me. It was such a big step for him. For 4 years long he kept it for himself. And now it's just a big relief for him to open up and say; yes, I like boys. I'm so damn proud of him! Can't believe for how long i waited for him to come out!**

**Now enough of this. On with the story.**

**btw Thank you all for your reviews, it made me smile ;)**

**and for this chapter, i hope you guys won't be mad or anything. please, Forgive me! **

**--**

**Rebound. **

**Ashley's P.O.V. **

''You're killing me, Ash!'' the older brunette said.

''No, we're not going to watch South, Tay.''

''But you were going to make-out in that scene! Gimme that remote control!'' she demanded and yank out the remote control out my hand. She zap through the channels and stopped right at the-n. ''Ah men, I missed it. Your fault. If you didn't change the channel and watch Grey's Anatomy, then I wouldn't have missed your make-out scene.''

''Yeah yeah, whatever.'' I said and stood up.

''Where you going?''

''I'm taking Buddy out for a walk.'' I put buddy's belt around his neck and opened the door. ''I'll be back soon.'' I said and closed the door before she could answer me back.

I wasn't in the mood for talking, neither did I want to sit on the couch and watch some South reruns. Everything was okay though. I've talked to Spencer and now it seems like everything is normal again. Back to how we all started from. Me and Spence as just friends and 'act' like never did happen between us.

Which is a lie.

I still love her. It's something you can't erase out of my heart.

But I understand her. I would do the same if I was pregnant, engaged and cheating on my fiancé. Just do the thing that would make everyone satisfied.

The weather is perfect today. I see people walking out their dog and people just enjoying the good weather.

I walked around the park and finally found an empty seat. If I wasn't this tired I wouldn't go lie on this park bench.

''Ahem...'' I opened my eyes to see who it was. ''Excuse me, but could I please sit here for a moment? You're kinda taking the whole seat for yourself.'' she said.

''Uh- I- I'm sorry. I- I was just tired.'' I stuttered and got up.

''Yeah I see that.'' she took the seat next to me and crossed her legs.

Her legs.

Oh. my. God.

Smooth.

She has brown hair and blue eyes. But not as blue as Spencer's.

Why am I comparing her with Spencer?! No one can replace her.

''Weather's good, don't you think?'' she asked while her eyes were closed.

''I guess.''

Poor Buddy, he's laying on the grass. I guess he's enjoying the sunny weather too.

''Man is it me or is today lovebirds day?'' she asked.

Well it is true though. Everywhere I go I see two happy couple making out or whatever they doing, it makes me sick. The only 2 empty seats without any 'couple' is where I was sitting right now.

I didn't say anything back. I wasn't in the mood for talking with strangers. Is that rude?

She looked at me. I know she's probably thinking of ways to talk to me. But no thank you. I'm fine with the silence.

10 seconds later and she looked at me again! This is getting creepier. ''Do you mind? I came here to clear up my mind and just relax for a moment. So please stop looking at me!''

''I- uh- sorry, but you seem kinda familiar to me.'' she stated

''Yeah I heard that a lot.''

''I'm Erin by the way. What's your name?'' the girl asked.

''Ashley.''

''Well nice to meet you, Ashley.'' she reached out her hand to take mine. Should I? Ah, what the hell. I smiled and shook her hand. ''You live nearby?'' she asked.

''Yeah right down the corner. You?''

''Really? Me too. I just moved in that apartment, next to Leafstone.''

''No way!'' this is too coincident. ''I live there!'' I said excited.

''No way! What number?''

''I live with my friend in number 14. Oh my god, that I haven't seen you before. What number do you live?''

She grinned at me. ''16.'' she stated.

''Dude, that's right next to mine. How long have you been here?''

''Almost 3 weeks.''

''Whoa. And I thought you were stalking me.'' I confessed.

''Stalking you? Why would I? I just met you.''

''Well- uh- yeah.'' Hey it's not a crime to think about it. But if she did, it wasn't the first time, though. Maybe I should keep it to my own. Don't need a friend just for my fame. And really, I'm not await for it. ''I think I'm going back.'' I stood up. ''You wanna come?''

The girl was startled. She smiled wide at me and I noticed how cute her smile was. Her perfect white teeth and her blue eyes were sparkling. ''I loved to.''

–

''No way!''

Erin stayed for awhile now. Taylor seems to like her. She stated, I quote; 'She's hot!'

yeah that's what she said.

''Way. She walked naked to the neighbors!''

Laughter's filled the room. And you know about who? About me. Yes, me walking naked. Sleep walking actually. I didn't know about it until Taylor told me about it the next day. She said I was sleepwalking and went to the neighbors. Great times. I should tell this to my grandchildren someday.

''So what happened next?'' the new girl asked.

''Nothing. She came back walking to her own room, leaving me, Mr. and Mrs. Kent in great confusion.''

I end up sitting there, playing with my ring. What can I say. She's staring at me with her blue eyes. Her beautiful blue eyes. Just like Spencer's. And I stared back. Ending up being lost in her eyes. But this time it's not Spencer's eyes I got lost in. No, not this time.

Taylor was looking back and forth, to me and Erin. She saw it. She knows.

''So I guess I should go now.'' She broke the eye contact with me. Standing up and staring down instead. ''It's getting late.''

''Oh ok. It's a good thing you live next door.''

She walked towards the door with me following her. ''It was nice to meet you though. Maybe we can do this again sometime.''

I smiled. ''Maybe we can. How about I'll see you tomorrow? You can drop by if you want.''

''Yeah, that would be nice. See you later Taylor.'' she said, returning a wave from Taylor. ''And I'll see you tomorrow then.'' She opened the door and walked out.

''Whoa, what was that?'' she asked.

''What was what?''

''You and her. You were having a stare contest with her. I don't blame you though. She's hot!''

''I don't have a stare contest with her. I don't have anything with her. I just met the girl this afternoon.'' I stated.

''You like her don't you?'' I shook my head. ''Yes you do! Ash, I've known you for how long, god knows. You like her. It's still confusing, though. I thought you like Spencer.''

''Well it's over. She's moving to Ohio with Jesse. There's nothing more to do, Tay. I have to get over her somehow.''

''And that's the part where Erin gets in.'' Taylor started ''You need to get over Spencer? Why not try it with Erin. She likes you. I know she does. And you seemed to like her too with the whole staring and smile thing. I say, why not go for it? Who cares if you just met her. You can get to know her better, right?''

''I guess... I don't know, Tay. Maybe I should think about it.''

I mean, I could try it. It doesn't hurt if you try, right?

God I really need to get something to hold on and get over her.

But can I?

–

Next morning I went right to work. We're finishing up the rehearsal I have with Spencer.

What great. Now instead of being real and as friend to her, I have to act like her lover, which I lost the role of it in real life.

''Okay this is how it's going to be.'' Tom started. ''Gabby comes in the room and sees Mandy broken and hurt on her bed. She tries to comfort her by staying with her for the night. The scene ends up with a kiss. So girls, show us some love.'' he said before walking back to the screenings.

Great.

Another make-out scene.

Can't get enough of it.

''You ready?'' she asked me. I nodded. Just as friends remember?

''Okay people. Action!''

I lay on my stomach on the bed. Spencer walked in.

''Mandy, what happened?''

''Ethan tries to sell my songs.''

''Huh? I thought things went well with your music.'' I changed my position. Now I'm laying next to her.

''It was. Until he said that the record company another artist had who could possibly be the next J-lo.''

''Who then?''

''Valery! Of all the people they want Valery to sing my songs. I can't let her sing my songs, Gab. It's like stealing from another artist.''

''Then don't. You don't have to if you don't want to. They are your songs, Mandy. It's your choice.'' she said.

''Gabby,'' I look up to her, meeting her blue eyes again. ''would you stay with me tonight?''

''Always.'' She promised me and pressed her soft lips on mine.

My hands around her neck as I pulled her down to me. Oh damn, I lost my control. I could swear I felt her tongue trace my lips.

''And cut!''

I opened my eyes. Meeting hers as we were laying in shock. We lost it. Our control. So much for being friends.

I stood up, walking away from Spencer and everybody. Till I got into my trailer and sat down.

The moment our lips touched. The moment I lost control of myself.

She lost it too.

I heard someone entering. I looked up and guess who I found standing in front.

Spencer.

''We need you for the next shoot.'' She said.

''I know. I just need a moment to myself.''

''Ok. And about what happened in there, I just though you should know I didn't mean to upset you or anything. We were just acting and got a bit off guard.''

And that's the thing; we were 'just acting'.

''I think they might need us now. You coming?''

I just nod and followed her behind.

--

As the day passed by, I was sitting alone at home. No sign of Taylor. I guess she'll be home late.

To be truth, I was bored. There's no one around. No Taylor, no Spencer, no Aiden.

Aiden. My gay ex-boyfriend. He told me recently that he went on vacation with Dylan. The guy must be a keeper. He confessed to me that he never felt anything so strong before for anybody. Even with me.

I turned on the TV and start zapping through the channels.

Nope. Nothing special.

Buddy came up to me with his toy in his mouth. Begging me to play with him. ''No not now, Bud.'' He lay down next to me. Looking at me with his puppy eyes.

Damn those puppy eyes.

Before I could take his toy and throw it somewhere else, the doorbell rang.

I stood up and held Buddy in my arm.

I opened the door and you would not believe who I saw.

Erin.

''Hi.'' She smiled at me.

''Hi to you too.'' I replied and let her in.

''I hope you don't mind I stop by.''

''No, not at all. I was just sitting here alone with Buddy watching TV.''

''You're bored, aren't you?'' she asked

''Yeah…'' I confessed. ''You want something to drink?'' I asked.

''No, thanks. So what did you do today?'' she asked.

Uh oh, I haven't told her about my job for living. ''Work.'' I said simply. ''You?''

''I went to my sister. So what do you do for work?'' she asked. Damn, should I tell her? She changed the channel. It is now on the-n.

Holy crap! South is on TV. ''Gawd, I love this show. That brunette is like so hot, don't you think?'' I blushed, thank you very much. I nod at her. Maybe she'll find out it herself. ''Hey, you know, you do look like that Mandy girl.'' She started.

And there's where she looked at me in shock. Then back again to the screen. And back to me again. All pieces fit in together. ''Holy shit! You're her, aren't you?''

''Yep, that's me.'' I stated.

''I knew it! That's why you looked familiar to me. Can't believe you're really her. Ashley Davies.''

''Yeah I know. Can't believe it either.'' Trust me, if you see where I live you wouldn't probably think i was

''But why didn't you tell me the other day?'' she asked curious.

''I was going to tell you though. But I was afraid if you're one of those wannabe friends. And let me tell you, I wasn't really await for that.''

''Oh, I understand. You thought I wanted to be friends with you because you're an actress.'' She said disappointedly

''No! That's not what I mean.'' I sigh and lowered my head. ''Just know I'm glad that I met you.''

''Really?''

''Yes.'' I really am glad. She's fun and cute. Her smile makes me smile and her eyes… let's just say they're beautiful. ''The other day at the park, I must confess I was kind of irritated by you.''

''Well, I'm sorry for that. Didn't mean to stalk you or anything. I was just… I don't know. I wanted to talk to you somehow.'' She smiled. Her smile. Her beautiful smile makes her eyes sparkle. I can't stop looking at her.

''You got that feeling too?'' she nods ''Well, then we should do something about it.''

"Ok. Let's do 20 questions then. You start. What's your favorite movie?'' she asked amusedly.

''Twilight.'' I answered.

''Oh my god, that's my favorite too. Have you read the books?''

''Yes I did. They're all amazing. Have you?'' she nods

''Yep, all of them.'' She smiled proudly.

Aw… her smile. ''Who's your favorite band?'' I asked

''Paramore. Definitely Paramore. They're like the best band ever.'' She answered ''What about you, who's your favorite band?''

I smiled widely.

Maybe it's just coincident.

Maybe it's meant to be.

But crap, that girl likes everything I like.

And not to mention, she called me hot.

I think I should try it.

My heart tells me to go for it.

Maybe she'll be the one who'll pick up the pieces Spencer left me.

I hope so.

''Paramore.''


	11. Handle me

**Thank you all for the reviews! I really appreciate every one of them so keep them coming ;) I try to make time to write both of my stories so please be patient on me, I'm kinda slow. ;] **

**hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**--**

**Handle me.**

**Ashley's P.O.V.**

A week. Only a week.

7 days and 168 hours till she's gone.

Only 7 fucking days and I have to say goodbye to her. Goodbye to her blue eyes, her smile, her presence. Everything. I'll miss her everything.

It's 9 am and I was getting ready for work. Taylor already left and made some breakfast for me. Pancakes. Her kickass pancakes!

I've been seeing Erin for 2 weeks now. She's so kind and lovely to talk to. Maybe as a friend. Or maybe more. Who knows. I just stick with the friends part, though. I'm not really ready for a new relationship. Not when Spencer is leaving.

"Come here Buddy." I give the little pup one last hug before heading out to my car.

Turning on the radio, I couldn't believe my ears!

What was I hearing?

My song on the radio!

My freakin song on the radio! My song I wrote for Spencer.

Thinking of you.

Why hasn't Taylor told me about this. I thought the record company haven't decided yet when they were going to launch this song. And now I'm sitting in my car, listening to this song. Every word. I remember I wrote every little word in this song about Spencer. _"You said move on Where do I go? I guess second best is all I will know."_

I know it has been a while since I sang this song to her. At the studio with my guitar. The day I asked her not to marry Jesse. The day I told her I was ready for her.

I was ready. She wasn't.

The song was getting to its end. The last guitar chords were playing. And the song switch from a soft gentle harmony to a loud screaming Ryan Searcrest.

_"And that's Thinking of you by Ashley Davies. Next we've got…"_

I turned off the radio and arrived 7 minutes later at the set.

There weren't many people around here. Where did they all go?

I entered the room where I found the crew discussing all together.

I walked to Madison, "Mads, what's going on here?" I asked her.

She turned around to face me. "Ashley! Thank god you're here. Tom wanted to say something important to all of us. I don't know what about, but we'll see." She smiled and turned away.

In all of this crowd, I was looking for one person. I search her everywhere, but couldn't find her. Where the hell is she?

"Ashley!"

And then I heard her. That angelic voice.

I turned around to face her. "Hey, I was looking for you." I said

"I just got here. What's going on?"

"I don't know. Tom is about to say something." I said and point to the men standing in front of the crowd.

"Would everybody please be quite? Thank you. I think I have some terrible news for you all. The network stated yesterday to me that South will not return for a 4 season. It is to my sorrow that the network has canceled South."

I heard the crowd went mad. What? Did I just hear that well. South is canceled?

I looked to Spencer who's face went pail. She looked at me, then back to Tom. "I'm sorry guys, but I don't know what else to do. I can't do much anything about it."

"Why are they cancelling South?" I heard one of the crowd asking.

"The network is going through some changes. And I guess South isn't a part of that. Look there's not much I can say about it. But we have a season to finish people. Our last few days together. Our last season. We should cherish it and love every moment of it. So go back to where we ended yesterday and finish this proudly! If you do have some questions, you can come to me. I'll be here all day." The men said his last words before the crowd were throwing all kinds of questions to him.

I turned around and thought I would find her behind me, but she's gone.

I walked away from all this and went to her trailer. Maybe she'll be there.

"Hey," I greeted her. "Are you ok?"

She looked up to me. "No, not really. I just need some human time."

"Oh ok, I should leave you alone then."

"No wait! Would you please stay for a minute? I kinda need some company now."

"Yes I would love to stay, but remember, we need to be ready in a half hour." I informed her

"This suck, doesn't it? They cancelling the show right when I was going to leave. I thought I was the one who let the show down. And now they're saying things changed? Why can't they find some better argument to say."

"Hey," I kneeled down to the poor girl who's sitting with her head low. "we knew this was going to happen someday. They don't give a damn about it since the beginning. It's over. We can't do anything about it. And for you to leave might me the better thing."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, if you were going to leave anyway, you don't have to miss a thing about your work anymore."

"Actually, I am going to miss it all. The crew, Madison, Eileen, You." I smiled at that last comment, thank you very much. "And the hardest part is that I'm never going back here again to this set, where we had such a great time together. I'll miss it all. I thought I'll be coming back after the baby, but what this bombshell dropped us is hard to deal with, you know."

"Yeah I know how you feel. Thinking of never coming back here must be hard for you." She nodded

"Well, enough of me. What about you?" she asked. What should I tell her? Oh, I met some random girl at the park, turns out she was my neighbor and now we're hanging out together. I think I like her.

Yeah that's what I should tell her.

"You know, I've heard your song on the radio this morning. Thinking of you, wasn't it?" I nodded. "Yeah, I love that song"

"Well duh, I wrote it for you." I confirmed.

She smiled at me, but then her smile faded and she turned her head away. "How have you been this couple of weeks?"

"Good. I've – uh- met someone." I stuttered out.

There you go. I said it.

"Oh really? That's great. So tell me about this 'someone' of yours. What's he like?"

Damn that girl can act! She got me with the 'I'm so happy for you' part. I never thought she would react this calm and curious about this.

"She. It's a she. And I met her at the park two weeks ago. She lives next door and we kinda hang around together."

"You like her?"

Oh god.

How am I going to answer this?

Yes. No. No! "Yes. No. Uh- I mean No! I don't know. It's confusing. Since the whole 'you know what' happened, I don't know if I could handle a new relationship."

"Why? Ash, you need someone. Someone who could actually be with you and who won't hurt you. Someone that's not me, Ash."

"But I'm in love with you, Spence. I still am. And it hurts me so much that I can't be with you. I know I've got to move on, but what if I can't?" stupid tears that wanting to break out any moment. Hold it in you Davies! "what if I can't, Spence?" I repeated myself.

"Ash, we've got over this. Let it go." She stood up and walked towards the door. "Come on, they're waiting for us." And left.

Let go? How?

--

Like every other day, it passed by and now I'm sitting alone and bored, watching TV as usual with Buddy beside me. I don't need to think twice before I grab my phone and called the only girl I know who's not busy.

_"Hey,"_ the girl on the other side of the phone spoke.

"Hey, um is it a bad time to talk?"

_"No, not at all. Why?"_

"Are you home?"

_"Yeah, I just got home."_

"Good. Now get your ass here, I'm bored."

_"Well, open your front door then_." Erin demanded.

"Wait, you're already here?" I walked towards the door, still on the phone, and I opened the door.

"Surprise." She said and hung up.

"You're amazing you know that?"

"Yeah, I know." She said confident and smiled widely at me. "So what did you want to talk about?" the girl asked.

"I don't know. I just kinda need someone right now." I took a seat on my couch. "Today has turned into a completely zombie day."

"How come?" she asked and sat next to me.

"Well, we, I mean the whole South crew, heard the news from the network. They are going to cancel South."

"Really?! Are you serious?" I nod. "Can they just do that?"

"Yes they can. This week will be the last week I'm ever going to film South again."

"Ash, I'm so sorry for you."

Ash.

She said Ash to me.

Love it when she says that.

"Thank you. Now shall we-" before I could finish my sentence, the door swung open and Taylor came in.

"Ash!" she immediately throw her purse on the counter and sat right next to me. "Are you okay? I read your message. Are they really going to cancel it?" the older brunette asked me worried. I nodded. "Those fucking bastards! I knew this would happen."

"Yeah we all did."

Then it was quiet for a moment.

No one tried to say something. Nothing appropriate.

Untill...

"We should do something to cheer you up." Erin said excited.

"I know what." My dear friend started. "I've got some big news for you, my little rockstar. Your song is out! Thinking of you is the newcomer in the charts. And for the cherry on top… your album is coming out in 2 weeks! How's that? Amazing huh!"

"Wow. In 2 weeks, really?" I was shocked, excited, and scared at the same time. My album who I've been working my beautiful ass off on it.

"Yes, and I assume you've already heard your song on the radio, haven't you?"

"God yes I did! It was amazing! And it sounded perfect." I confirmed. "So is there going to be a music video for it?"

"I don't know yet. I think so, but I will ask that tomorrow morning if it would please my little rockstar." She said and pulled me in a hug. "I'm so proud of you!" she said.

"Taylor, you sound like my mother." I teased her.

"I'm so happy for you, Ashley." Erin said and I turned to face her. "Trust me, the day your album's in store, I'll be the first one to buy it." Aw, she knows how to make a girl happy, doesn't she? My eyes can't keep away from her smile. "Oh and when you're giving a concert, I'll be the one in front, holding a big board with 'You rock my world, Ashley D!' on it." She smirked.

"You can be my groupie!"

She smirked at me.

My own groupie.

Hmm…

"Who wants to hear my little rockstars debut single?" Taylor asked. She looked at the clock then turned on the radio next to the TV. "5:30, right on time."

_"Next we have a newcomer, Ashley Davies. Might as well known as Mandy on the teen show South of Nowhere. Daughter of rock star Raife Davies. And now she has her first single, here playing on Z100. Thinking of you." _The dude on the radio mentioned me!

Right after, we heard the guitar strumming and my voice singing the verse.

Erin was listening attentive to it. Taylor, in the other hand, was grinning at me. She knows what this was about. She knows who it was about.

And now it hits the chorus. Those lines where all pieces of what happened in my life. '_Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you_.' Like when I was with Aiden, I was only thinking of her.

We were all listening to it. The music that brought us some rest and peace. And when it came to an end, we were still speechless

"Wow. OK. That was amazing." A compliment coming from the girl who's sitting next to me with her jaws dropped.

"Thank you."

"The lyrics were so touchy. Where did you get the idea from?"

Uh oh.

"Uh oh." I hit Taylor on her arm. "sorry." She whispered.

"What was the uh-oh for?"

Damn, the girl's curious.

"I wrote the song for someone special."

"Aw, that's romantic. For who?"

Again with the questions!

"You might know her actually. It's uh for uh- Spencer."

"Spencer?" her tone was questioning as if she didn't know for sure it was THE Spencer. Or like if she didn't want to know it was her. "Spencer Carlin?"

I nodded, Taylor looked away, she's confused.

"You dated Spencer Carlin?" the girl was almost screaming from excitement. "You play a couple on-screen and you girls date off-screen??"

No, she didn't look upset. Although, that's how I thought she would be.

"Well, actually, no. We're not. I want to tell you this but you have to promise me not to tell anyone else." She zipped her lips closed and nodded. "She is engaged if you didn't know that and there's more, but that part I don't know if I can tell you. I – uh, we had something secretly. But that didn't last long. We broke up 2 weeks ago. She's moving back to Ohio with her fiancé. So we decided to end this thing that we have."

She was listening attentive to it.

I think I just saw her jaw drop.

No joke.

Poor girl, can she handle this?

Can she handle me?


End file.
